Thursday, September 12, 2013


    I have an itch that I cant seem to satisfy lately. I have tried, oh believe me, I have tried. Its the International itch. It is more than that actually, it is the radical travel the world preach Jesus save orphans and worship ...fever. It is not even winter so I know this is not a mood. I have repented from discontentment and laid it upon the alter of my great God. I have sermonized myself away from achieving or aiming at Work's to please God or fill my soul. I have prayed over and over. I have repented and prayed again about being impatient or impulsive. I have submitted to my season at home as a married woman raising up an arrow for the Lord.

    Despite all this..I am still itching. My fever grows steadily worse as the world plunges into wars and rumors of wars. Children are sold daily and I see their faces in dreams and hear their cries at local centers. I counsel woman leaning and stretching to hear the Holy Spirit over the sarcastic mocking voice of the enemy screaming into the lives of the daughters of Christ I am privileged to sit next to. I just long to do more. To cast off the world's offerings and plunge into my Father's arms and plead, " what can I do for you daddy?" I want to do more. I stare into the evil deceiving face of lack even in our own family. I filter judgemental remarks even from believers when I pledge my life to serving Christ by being a mom of ten. I fail daily to be compassionate to the people in my very own family and suffer to guard my heart against frustrations that are simply every day American living. Lately even bottled water can send me into a spin and prayer that could result in locking myself in a room and just worshiping God. Why do I get clean water? What made me so special that I can gulp it down like a fish and toss it in my trash that quickly and neatly disappears as requested by my trash man? I told you I have a fever!

   So, pray for me that in this fever, I see clarity from my precious savior who is never ever confusing. Pray for me to seek the Lord and not struggle with this ...fever to serve by reading and meditating on His Holy words in the Bible. Pray for me to seek understanding regarding this fire he has kindled and where to take this passion. Pray the enemy is defeated instead of my confidence. I know this is from the Lord but am easily distracted by everyday demands and service. Thank you! May God be Praised!

1 Corinthians 13:8


  1. Jamie- thank you so much for putting into words these feelings I have every day. Waiting for His timing can be hard, especially when you are so willing. God bless you in this journey and thank you again for sharing. I enjoy reading your blog and posts.